My Dear, I read your whole blog and started following you today. I have to say, you've been through alot. You've been to too much for your 18years of life. You really have to start living your life. It's obviously there is no possibility you can stop mia with your own strenght, she already took it from you. You really need someone on the outside to help you. A therapist. Or a friend. It's your decision, you know a therapist wont let you starve but he can stop your purging. You need to learn how to eat 'normal' amound of foods, again. You could also ask a friend for help. A real friend like lucy or jay. The fear of hurting them with what you do should keep you from purging. They're your friends and you have to be honest with them.
I hope you're doing well and coming back to your blog more often. from now on you have my mental support, I really wish you would get better soon.
I wish I had a miraculous answer, something to fix the horrible feelings you have, the damaging thoughts plaguing your mind. But I cannot fix myself even. Maybe in another time, when my own thoughts weren't so infected and deranged, I would be a resource or support of some sort. I was always good at helping others: I'd put my own needs on the back burner. Nowadays, my needs are feeble, and that's much worse than having demanding needs...when your needs are so lost and exhausted, all of you is lost and exhausted. Know that I will always love you for who you are, for fighting, for being lost and exhausted like me, for trying, for failing, for crying, for breaking down, for succeeding. I can't guess if I'll ever again be up for writing down my thoughts coherently, incoherently even. But I can guarantee that even if I were to stop commenting, I will still be reading your blog and, in the event that I stopped reading for some reason, you will continue to be in my thoughts. You are such a beautiful person, and your insecurities and perceived imperfections make you human. Be strong. On this blog, you are a strong voice and a hero. Do the people that support you here turn their back on you, snicker when you mess up, when you embarrass yourself? Do they try to break you? If they ever do, don't let them because, I promise, you can withstand it all. Be this bold outside of this blog; don't hide yourself and your flaws (I don't mean to go out and scream about your problems from the rooftops, or even flat out share them with anyone). Be you, because you are not alone and, by not shielding your weak side, you'll become confident; knowing that you don't have to hide will give you strength. In high school, you may be eaten alive by following that advice, but it's only because everyone at that age is insecure and broken and scared, and no one wants to show it. I just want you to understand that, sometimes, showing your weakness to the world will not curse you, it'll just make you human. Admittedly, people out in the real world will not be nearly this supportive, but they will look up to you because of that strength and fearlessness to bare your soul. xoxo
Stay strong, beautiful. You can do this.
ReplyDeleteMy Dear, I read your whole blog and started following you today.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, you've been through alot. You've been to too much for your 18years of life.
You really have to start living your life.
It's obviously there is no possibility you can stop mia with your own strenght, she already took it from you.
You really need someone on the outside to help you. A therapist. Or a friend. It's your decision, you know a therapist wont let you starve but he can stop your purging. You need to learn how to eat 'normal' amound of foods, again.
You could also ask a friend for help. A real friend like lucy or jay. The fear of hurting them with what you do should keep you from purging. They're your friends and you have to be honest with them.
I hope you're doing well and coming back to your blog more often.
from now on you have my mental support, I really wish you would get better soon.
xoxo<3
Bella
I wish I had a miraculous answer, something to fix the horrible feelings you have, the damaging thoughts plaguing your mind.
ReplyDeleteBut I cannot fix myself even. Maybe in another time, when my own thoughts weren't so infected and deranged, I would be a resource or support of some sort. I was always good at helping others: I'd put my own needs on the back burner. Nowadays, my needs are feeble, and that's much worse than having demanding needs...when your needs are so lost and exhausted, all of you is lost and exhausted.
Know that I will always love you for who you are, for fighting, for being lost and exhausted like me, for trying, for failing, for crying, for breaking down, for succeeding.
I can't guess if I'll ever again be up for writing down my thoughts coherently, incoherently even. But I can guarantee that even if I were to stop commenting, I will still be reading your blog and, in the event that I stopped reading for some reason, you will continue to be in my thoughts.
You are such a beautiful person, and your insecurities and perceived imperfections make you human. Be strong. On this blog, you are a strong voice and a hero. Do the people that support you here turn their back on you, snicker when you mess up, when you embarrass yourself? Do they try to break you? If they ever do, don't let them because, I promise, you can withstand it all. Be this bold outside of this blog; don't hide yourself and your flaws (I don't mean to go out and scream about your problems from the rooftops, or even flat out share them with anyone). Be you, because you are not alone and, by not shielding your weak side, you'll become confident; knowing that you don't have to hide will give you strength. In high school, you may be eaten alive by following that advice, but it's only because everyone at that age is insecure and broken and scared, and no one wants to show it. I just want you to understand that, sometimes, showing your weakness to the world will not curse you, it'll just make you human.
Admittedly, people out in the real world will not be nearly this supportive, but they will look up to you because of that strength and fearlessness to bare your soul.
xoxo