another check-in from utah.

1. i fell off my board. wreaked my shoulders & the right side of my body. meaning = no exercise for a week. FAT.
2. the purging hasn't stopped.
i can't stop.
3. too many comments about me finally eating.

"you look good, you've got meat on your bones this year."

"oh good, look she's eating again."

"you don't look like a zombie anymore."

i miss the zombie.

4. mental health comments? those too.

"oh yeah, give her the serrated knife. just in case she decides to slit her wrists it wont be as easy."

5. constantly ragged on for my harsh personality. i'm very bad at dealing with emotions,
& people.
6. i'm lonely.
as weird as that is because i'm so very much not a people-person, or social at all really, it's the total displacement of environment that really get's me. not only am i surrounded by nothing, but i'm trapped in it.

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REPLIES FROM THE LAST TWO POSTS:

alice; thanks so much for the support.
kristal (who has currently left for recovery but i'll reply here anyways.); oh gosh you put a smile on my face. thank you.
bree; thank you, but i don't feel all that strong. she is, & thanks, i do often forget to breathe.
lindsay; thank you, i agree.
neverfit; thanks for the encouragement; i'm sure you'll be thinspo one day soon too. ;)

katerina; oh gosh, thank you. lol, first i have to get little. ;P
ZOIE; mmhmm, when i'm more mia i get super-freaked out too!
sleep-aids killing your appetite? interesting, i just use them to sleep through dinner.
defiantly blogging, it really does use up a lot of my time.
gum & diet drinks! oh yes, live off coke zero, poweraid zero, & coffee w/ splenda. all very filling.
alicja; all very true, thank's so much.

staystrong, page.