its just been a hide-under-the-covers kind of wednesday.

{ wednesdays are great;
school at ten.
volunteer after school; less time at home with mother & food.
mother always plays poker. }

wednesdays i don't have school until ten; but i still managed to be late today. (good-job.)
hadn't really finished much school work. WR teacher told me to fix my isu outline & give it back later. "wasn't worth her time to mark."
at lunch a cracked & had a bite of my friends cookie.
friends left me at school & walked to volunteering without me. were not talking..
i got out early, waited for the bus for fifteen minutes, & when it came by, i was standing next to the post, ticket in hand. it drove by.
i know its stupid, but i've been in such a horrible mood. i went back into the bus shelter, re-buried myself in a book & tried not to bawl.
came home. crawled under the covers, & sat in the dark. (for a minute. i can't stand more than 55seconds of silence.) grabbed a book, on went the radio.
i wanted to try the chocolate-coffee again. this time a little less coffee, maybe build up a better tolerance? the part about it stopping cravings & all probably doesn't work if i drink it with a chocolate chip muffin. crap.
whole piece of breaded fish for dinner.
cardio at nine to try & even myself out because i had gone over 800.

lunch; fruit-bar 50 + cookie piece 32
snack; muffin 430 + chocolate-coffee 47
dinner; breaded-fish & ketchup 300
workout; -160
today's total (so far); 680.

the wonderful fitclick program claims this means i'm loosing 1.7lbs this week if i keep it up. is that enough?

no.